FLASH FICTION!!!!!

        Pain now has a face
        In the hours between 
       Dawn and dusk 
        It rears its ugly head
       And makes a demand
        "Feel me". "Feel me".

                  -Nkeiruka Okafor

Amaromechi. But never Amaechi. 

I do not know tomorrow.

This is what I will call my daughter, Agatha thought to herself. She had it all planned out. The name, the first birthday, she had even told Prince her husband to create a height checker in the kitchen. Like she had seen in those family films that aired on the local channel on Saturday evenings. She was thankful for this baby. She thought back to many years ago when she still had a bounce in her walk and fiery hope, she had just become a bride. She remembered the first time somebody addressed her as Mrs Ikeagwu, it was at the hotel they had spent their honeymoon. She had beamed,smiled so much at the receptionist she thought her ears would sue her lips for trespassing. It was so long ago. All her life Agatha had always wanted to nurture. She had catered to Mr Teddy- the stuffed animal her mother had gifted her for her third birthday, when she turned 16, she nurtured plants around her home and when she graduated university, Agatha bred pets. She owned a gold fish, a puppy and a kitten. A nurturer is what Amaechi called her. 

Being the only child of her parents made her life bittersweet. She could have used a lot less attention. She had made a pact with Amaechi when they were both 17 and 16 respectively, "we must try to observe balance. I want to have four children, two boys and two girls- or six or eight so that I'll spread my love evenly", Agatha said, her bright yellow dress billowing in the wind. Amaechi laughed. As the daughter of her father's oga, Amaechi knew Agatha was better than her even though her daddy had tried to tell her no one was better than her. It wouldn't be the first time her father would tell her a lie. Just the other day he told her she was the most beautiful girl in the world and later that night, she had heard him tell the same to her mother. Amaechi at 16 hadn't learned that beauty was relative. The first time the pair had met was at the end of year party thrown by Agatha's parents. Amaechi had been clinging to her father all night until she saw Agatha sitting by herself and talking to a brown teddy bear. She couldn't imagine a girl her age playing with stuffed animals but she didn't mention it to Agatha when she walked over to her. Amaechi wanted a stuffed animal too. "What is your name?" Amaechi asked, "Agatha".

Her first kiss. Her first period. Her first boyfriend. Her first heartbreak. Her first confirmation of vaginal agenesis. Amaechi had seen Agatha through a lot of firsts. When she had found out she couldn't bear children, Amaechi's had been the first pair of ears to hear. There was a sort of balance in their friendship. Agatha was the giver and Amaechi stayed. She gave her clothes to Amaechi. She convinced her father to pay for Amaechi's university education. She sublet her room to Amaechi at no cost. She gave Amaechi her first car when she got another. She just gave and gave and gave that she didn't realize that what wasn't given had been taken. 

She has refused to discuss the ordeal. Sometimes she had nightmares. Sometimes, while cooking the image of Amaechi and Prince wrapped around eachother on her silky bedcover would flash before her and she would cry. Not the kind of cry she had cried when her father passed, then she had just stared and the tears flowed silently. This cry was a cry in every sense of the word. Agatha would wail. Her doctor had placed her on antidepressants. When Prince told her Amaechi was pregnant, she had smiled and requested full custody of the child. Prince had agreed. He wanted to talk, to explain away his infidelity but Agatha wasn't having it. She didn't want to know why she had come home from work and found her husband and her best friend having sex on her new silky bed cover. It was not her business.

Now at 39, Agatha will take. Amaechi will give. Smoothing her hand over her hair, Agatha smiled. Amaromechi is here. Her child is here. Prince held the baby like he was afraid any little movement could break her. The sight of Prince in the living room with her baby brought tears to her eyes. Her baby. She stood to receive her gift with arms outstretched, Prince smiled and placed the baby in her arms. "There's an envelop on the dining table, the papers have been signed by me. Sign them, your bags are packed and are sitting in your car. Get out and never come back." Agatha had always wanted to nurture.




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